Who are you?

Yesterday in class we were talking about time management. Part of that included a discussion around personality types. For example, if you know you are the type of person who works best in the afternoon, you should save your complex tasks to the afternoon.

It got me thinking about my personality type in regards to other things. I know well that my brain functions best, in terms of inspiration, from 1am to 8am. I find that I have some quite lucid and thought provoking moments especially just after I've woken. If there was some mechanism for brain dumping that didn't involve typing or talking to a computer you would be hearing a lot more from me. Perhaps that's a good thing (that I can't). By the time I've completely woken, showered, shitted, and shaved however the idea is either lost or my usual apathy towards knuckling down and typing has surfaced.

Today is an exception. I knew today would be a free day and I guess that was part of the motivation to get up and do something. Even though I went to bed at 3am I got up around 8am and headed off to Bambi Cafe for my 5 lira breakfast.

2 slices of luncheon, 2 slices of cheese, 2 large baguettes with honey and "Beyaz" (white) cheese, one orange juice and one tea later I now find myself in another favourite haunt - Simit Salonu. Essentially it's a çay bahçesi or tea house. They serve lots of bread treats and sweets too. All of which the Turks love. Upstairs you can usually find some peace and quite to contemplate the mysteries of life or, as I do, study Turkish.

Being someone who is easily bored I find combining food/drink outings with study a relaxing way to pass the time.

And so this morning I was thinking about my personality type. I am the kind of person who likes to know how things work. As a youngster in my father's workshop (he was a watchmaker) this wasn't such a good thing.

Whilst I wouldn't like to call myself accident prone I think it's probably a fair statement looking back. I would often bump into the inner workings of a grandfather clock precariously perched upon a trestle. Which of course would incite the wrath of my father. I became very afraid of certain parts of his shop after a while. And like the analogy of "Don't think about pink elephants" the harder I tried to avoid these danger zones the more I found myself gravitating towards them.

I carry a legacy with me to this very day whereby I prefer to use plastic cups and plates rather than ones which have the potential to be broken. Incidentally this has the flip-side effect of giving me pleasure when I do use some nice tableware - particularly well crafted wine glasses - which isn't as often as I might like.

As well as pondering the inner mysteries and workings of various objects I came to appreciate efficiency. This is most apparent in a workplace. I'm an expert at logistics and processes. It's not hard for me to identify an inefficiency and discover an improvement.

Whist on the face of it, this sounds all fine-and-dandy in reality it naturally only works where I have control over things. In places where I cannot easily influence a situation I often find myself at loggerheads with management. It often involves arguements over one person's logic versus another's which of course has it's own inherent difficulties.

This is further complicated by another personality trait. I don't like to lose. I can bang my head against a brick wall for an extremely long time before I admit defeat. This works with past mistakes too. I'll repeat them indefinitely in the vain hope that this time it will work - "Stupidity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result".

Then you get the scenarios where I have no influence whatsoever. Of course these are easier to deal with because I simply move on knowing there is nothing I can do.

Another downside implied in the view that "Things are there to be improved" is the idea that there is something wrong to start with.

When I first came to Istanbul, I found myself trying to walk quickly through masses of people and becoming frustrated with the impossibility of it. No matter how cleverly I twisted, turned, and looked ahead to find the best path, I would ultimately be thwarted in my endeavours.

Thus I tried to adopt what could best be called the "Mediterranean" pace of life. This works wonders in summer. It's basically compulsory unless you want to be bathed in sweat. However, over time, I've noticed that I have returned back to my pace of old.

It's funny really. I rush about outside with purpose and then rush back home so as to not to have wasted any time. And then I busily do nothing at home and complain of being bored!

I can hear phrases like, "Stop and smell the roses", "Savour the moment", and "Live in the present" wafting into my consciousness. Alas, for me, they are not so easily done. However I can say I'm much better now than I used to be.

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On Tuesday last I meet with my Turkish friends who have a long standing tradition of meeting to practice their English. It's a diverse bunch and sometimes the conversation is a bit wayward. Having said that, they have so far managed to ask me about my sex life in Istanbul and also why the heck am I growing a funny looking goatie. I found the latter more disconcerting than the former!

On our latest agenda was the topic of blogging and Mürsel, who organises the group, sent us some information about blogging to earn money which was quite interesting, if not ultimately rather complex.

But the good thing is that it's got me out here writing more than two cents and also writing from myself. I don't know about you but whilst I find Facebook reposts very inspirational, cute, funny, etc they tell me very little about what's going on with the person behind the post. Sure you can see if they post something funny it usually means they are happy themselves but I find something lacking.

I'm often tempted to post asking people to write something in their own words for a change. In fact, I'd actually challenge them to do it, because I suspect many would find this very difficult.

My teacher teacher (he taught me how to teach) Pete is very good at this. He writes simple little pearls about his life and what he's doing. They are brief, concise, and usually humorous.

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Back to Mürsel for a second - she has this notion that I'm going to blog about "Experiences in Istanbul". I told her I'd heard of this idea of putting a hidden camera in ones glasses to allow other to observe your life as if they were there. I'd love to do it, but interestingly found out at our last meeting that it would be impossible in Turkey due to laws about filming other people without their permission. I guess this applies to all countries although I'd never heard of it before. Do you think people who do documentaries ask everyone for their permission first? It defeats the purpose of creating a real-life doco doesn't it?

She took my discussion of the idea a little too seriously, thinking that I was actually going to do it and being a journalist who wants to create her own successful blog she's gotten all enthusiastic about "mine". Ugh. :)

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Speaking of challenges - one of my inspirations has been to create a website with weekly challenges on it. The idea is to challenge people to do those things they say they'll do "if" or "when". The ulterior motive is that I can hardly espouse to others the benefits of action versus none without being a champion of it myself.

Like most people, I assume, I have a long list of "I wish…". Top of the list, and I've repeatedly said this to people with zero action, is to have a motorcycle. Ridiculously I have 2 motorcycle licences and yet have never owned one.

As with riding a bicycle it has the feeling of freedom, the wind rushing into your face, together with the exciting side to side sway as you corner. When I hop onto either mode of transport I'm transported (lol) into a world of possibility. Simply being able to travel so much further than by foot opens up a new world of opportunities. Travelling in a box with 4 wheels just isn't the same.

And so I'm quietly working away on yet another project. Whether it comes to fruition is yet to be seen and in my mind I have grand plans for it, but without some outside expertise I fear it will RIP or at the very most be something I do for 2 weeks and then when there is no feedback or uptake be disillusioned and give up.

Having high expectations is a b….

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A text message! Hallelujah! A real live human friend!